For over half of my life, I’ve had a crush on Johnny Depp. I own every one of his movies and have the entire lifespan of 21 Jump Street on tape. I can’t get away with having his posters up on my bedroom wall anymore, but you can bet I still have them safely stowed away.

Every single man I’ve ever loved has been a slim brunette with stubble and a penchant for rum and black cigarettes… Some even had Cubist tattoos.

Recently I even…

When I was younger, my arguing repertoire consisted of pulling my baby sisters’ hair and to run as fast as my 8 year old chicken legs would carry me.

Aaah! If only I could get away with that behaviour now. Boyfriend: “Babe! How could you have spent our grocery money on shoes!!” Me: *pulls his hair*, yells “weh weh weh” and bolts…

You can be in a relationship for months without having to argue. But… it’s such a smorgasbord of…