I’m not going to pretend to be holier-than-thou/learned/academic. There is nothing quite as stupefying as someone who’s so unbelievably, excessively attractive that you’d offer to bear their children before they open their mouths.

Halfway through a scintillating conversation with your friends, you see him glide across the room- time stands still- you sit, gobsmacked, muted, suddenly the ridiculous song playing in the background seems to be singing *only* to…

Oh God, I did it. I swore I never would. I became ‘that girl’—Miss Nice. You see, I have black hair, red lips, pale skin, 34C’s, I’m French-Scottish and I’m born in Year of the Monkey… I tend to scare them off.

I thought being ‘the girl next door’ might make a refreshing change. I thought, well, I’m getting older, let’s try charitable and nice. Less Joan Jett and more Betty Crocker.

One of the fab things about being friends…

I used to joke that I have become so jaded, that I go along to my first date in a tracksuit. In fact, jaded is kind of a massive outrageous understatement of how easily it was becoming to believe that men are just confused, selfish and mostly not very nice.

I’ve met many creative, talented, successful, attractive men in the past year. But very few of them have actually had the remotest idea of what they want, or been honest about it (except for one, Mr…